[Ashley McGowen] Most people have been impressed by how little the past year seems to have permanently affected Ashley. It's been said: the Hermetic is good at seeming like she has her shit together. But sometimes it's the little things that have etched themselves into her behavior and her personality that suggest that she's not as entirely unaffected as she'd like to seem.
For example. Yesterday, her twenty-ninth birthday, she left her apartment only once: that was to Stride to the Court, where she could safely meet Kage, and where they had cupcakes. And then she Strode home, and utterly avoided the city. She couldn't shake the idea that if she showed up anywhere in the general area of Chicago, circumstance would somehow align itself such that something horrific would happen simply because she'd hoped to have a good day. Today, she is convinced that she had a good day yesterday because she avoided the city streets.
She isn't the sort of person who takes well to being shut up inside all day, though, and she was quite eager to get out this morning in spite of the reprieve of the Court and Kage yesterday afternoon. So she's out early. At the library. Thunder's roaring outside as though it could bring down the pillars that hold up the structure's ceiling by sheer volume alone.
Ashley is doing what most people could expect her to do at a library: she's amassed a pile of books and is hastily flipping pages, back and forth, marking them down. Hard at work on her thesis, probably. She has the harried look of mid-semester. She just managed to escape the rain, and so she's dry, dressed in a form-fitting knit black shirt that's trimmed in light blue, sleeves rolled to the elbows. There's a pen hanging out of the corner of her mouth for lack of a better place to put it.
[Jarod Nightingale] [Awaaaareness?]
Dice Rolled:[ 5 d10 ] 2, 2, 3, 8, 10 (Success x 2 at target 6)
[Jarod Nightingale] This was how survivors lived - things happened, and then they moved on. It was all that they could do, sometimes, if they wanted to keep living, and not only in the sense that they were clinically alive. Most, if not all, of the Awakened in Chicago understood this survival tactic. Ashley, perhaps, more than most. They had this in common, she and Jarod. Though anyone who didn't know him well would be hard pressed to wonder how hard his life could possibly be. And justifiably so. His life revolved around himself, and if outward appearances were any indication, that self was very well taken care of.
Except, it didn't revolve entirely around himself anymore. And that was precisely the problem. (Or perhaps, the improvement.) And no matter how hard Jarod might try to hide this fact from others, it was perhaps inevitable that some day someone was going to run into them. The alternative was locking the poor girl away, and that was hardly an option.
They were in the library this morning. The trip served a dual purpose of keeping Ilana entertained while he dug through the books in the foreign language stacks. The almost-eleven-year-old was sitting cross-legged on the floor next to him with a book in her lap, leaning her elbows on her knees as she read. Her dark hair hung in loose curls that fell past her shoulders, some of which had draped over her face, partially obscuring it from view. She was dressed in jeans and a soft lilac sweater, and had a fragile-looking white-gold necklace with a teardrop purple garnet hanging at the hollow of her throat. (Amazing that she hadn't broken it. It was probably only a matter of time before she did.)
Jarod, of course, looked just as he always did. Dressed up or dressed down, he never looked tired, or unkempt, and he never seemed anything but poised and self-assured. (At least, when looked at from afar.) It was a relaxed day, so he had on jeans and a fitted black henley. For awhile he hadn't noticed Ashley's presence over at the tables. His focus was on other things. Eventually, though, her resonance crept up on him, nagging at his attention like the hum of a familiar song being murmured across the room. He glanced up from the book in his hand and craned his head around the edge of the shelving unit.
Ah. Of course.
He glanced down at Ilana. Then went back to what he was doing. Perhaps in the hope that they would remain unnoticed.
[Ashley McGowen] [Awareness?]
Dice Rolled:[ 7 d10 ] 1, 4, 4, 5, 9, 10, 10 (Success x 2 at target 6)
[Ashley McGowen] If Jarod was hoping that he and his daughter would go unnoticed in the library, Ashley was probably one of the worst magi he could have run into. She's very sharp when it comes to some things, and her senses are particularly attuned to the supernatural. Her mentor was a hard, bitter, nigh on abusive woman but both of these two could probably attest to the fact that harsh circumstances had taught them useful things. (There'd been a point, in fact, where their MO and perspective when it came to other people was alarmingly similar. Chicago will change people, if nothing else.)
Not only is Ashley especially keen with these things, but she also tends not to ignore people she knows when she catches them around. It's a manner borne less out of friendliness and more out of habit: despite her protests, people continue to call her the Deacon, and she continues to carry herself like the city is wholly hers.
At this very second, though, she hasn't noticed Jarod yet. She won't for a few minutes; she's flipping through pages with the sort of reckless abandon that has them noisily crinkling through the stacks. There's a low curse, and finally she too starts for the foreign language stacks, leaving the books scattered over the table she was using. The library is quiet on Sunday, so fortunately the space isn't in high demand.
She's about to start rifling through the texts that are in Chinese, and that's when she feels Jarod's presence like a cold blast of air against the back of her neck. And she glances up, pulling the pen away from the corner of her mouth where it had been held like a cigarette and tucking it into her pocket. Ilana would have gone unnoticed - she looks just like any other ten (almost eleven) year old here - except that she's sitting on the floor next to Jarod. Who doesn't seem like the babysitting type.
"Hey," she says, her gaze flicking back up toward the Verbena after a lingering second on Ilana.
[Jarod Nightingale] In truth, he hadn't really expected to escape this encounter unnoticed. Perhaps the fact that he hadn't made an active attempt to hide himself and his daughter from detection was indicative of a kind of surrender to the fates. If Ashley was going to find them, she was going to find them.
But that didn't mean he was particularly thrilled when she appeared into view. Jarod was not in the Chinese-language section, but rather a few feet down, where the books in Korean were located. One of them was open in his hand. It looked old, and when he closed it, embossed gold characters could be seen marking the dark leather binding. His eyes didn't immediately go to Ashley. Instead they trailed briefly up to the ceiling as he tilted his head back. It seemed a gesture of silent exasperation. Then he cleared his throat gently, looked at Ashley, and smiled.
"Hi."
He did not make any attempt to introduce the little girl sitting next to him on the floor, but Ilana looked up of her own accord and pushed the hair away from her face. She was sitting on Jarod's far side, so he was between her and Ashley, but positioned in a way that he did not block the view. The girl seemed curious, but she didn't say anything. (Clearly this was one of Jarod's numerous acquaintances, and may or may not hold any particular interest.)
[Ashley McGowen] [Was that...impatience? 'Fuck off, Ashley'? What? Empathy roll.]
Dice Rolled:[ 7 d10 ] 3, 3, 7, 7, 9, 9, 10 (Success x 3 at target 8)
[Jarod Nightingale] [Subterfuge, cause I'd rather you just wondered]
Dice Rolled:[ 6 d10 ] 1, 2, 2, 2, 4, 5 (Botch x 1 at target 6)
[Jarod Nightingale] [Score for the Hermetic!]
[Ashley McGowen] Ashley doesn't miss that roll of his eyes skyward, and its meaning isn't lost on her either - that it was a reaction to her rather than to something else he found. Those things come to her sometimes during observations, these brief flashes of insight about why other people do what they are doing: something that she puts together based on the facts that she's gathered. On the rare occasion that Ashley manages this kind of understanding, it's always after a few seconds to process what her senses took in, and always because the outward signs of it are clear. She can't gauge by tone and expression alone. She probably never will again.
If she's hurt or offended by the less than warm reception, it doesn't really show; she suspects it isn't a reaction to her specifically anyway. There's a pause in which she isn't sure of what to say, because Jarod doesn't offer much and because Ilana's presence throws her off a little.
She too is curious. She hasn't missed the resemblance either. Niece? Nephew?
"How are you?" she asks him, after those few beats of silence. A glance toward Ilana. "And who's this?" It's not the sharp, interrogative kind of question that she might offer if he had shown up with an adult who'd drawn her curiosity; her voice mellows a little. She knows how to deal with pre-teens and teenagers. She's probably one of the ten people in the world who actually likes them, as a whole.
[Jarod Nightingale] [Empathy (Ilana)]
Dice Rolled:[ 8 d10 ] 1, 1, 4, 7, 7, 7, 9, 9 (Success x 3 at target 6)
[Ashley McGowen] [Subterfuge]
Dice Rolled:[ 6 d10 ] 1, 2, 2, 4, 8, 9 (Success x 1 at target 6)
[Ashley McGowen] It wouldn't be accurate to say that Ashley is a person who hides how she's feeling. It's odd for most people who first meet her to try to get a sense of what she thinks, because if a person isn't really looking, things seem so clear. She's not an unreadable, inscrutable mask. She's brash and Willful and a touch socially awkward in spite of her intelligence (and a lot of other things too, but nevermind those.)
Right now she isn't quite sure of how to navigate. And that's not an act: she really is a little unsure of how to navigate. She would be with anyone, but she's never quite sure of where she stands with Jarod. She gets a little frustrated because his moods are capricious and so is he and she can't quite anticipate what he's going to do. She finds it a little disrespectful, but not enough to force confrontation over it.
She likes him and thinks he's interesting, but it's with a sort of detachment (she hasn't placed a claim over him or invested herself in his wellbeing like she has with a handful of people, but he isn't just another person either) and a sort of caution that is not generally extended toward others.
to Jarod Nightingale
[Jarod Nightingale] The girl's eyes were paler than Jarod's: silvery-gray in color, but there was an exotic shape to them that belied ancestry that may not have been completely Caucasian. One might not necessarily guess at a mixed bloodline when looking at her, but put her next to her father and suddenly it become more obvious. She'd been watching the interaction between Ashley and Jarod with reserved interest, but when Ashley asked after her, it was the girl and not Jarod who answered.
"Ilana," she offered, politely. She knew the drill. Since moving to Chicago, there'd been a steady stream of people who she'd had to meet and introduce herself to, from the kids at her new school to her father's co-workers, and occasionally even his dates. (If you could, in fact, call them such.) Like most kids, Ilana was good at reading body language, and she was more perceptive than most. For a moment her watchful gaze landed on Jarod, then back on Ashley. She rolled her lower lip between her teeth and started to gnaw on it.
Jarod glanced down at the girl when she spoke, before bringing his gaze back to the Hermetic. "We're fine. I thought I'd stop by and pick out a few books. Easier to learn a language when you actually have to use it."
He didn't seem all that uncomfortable, but nonetheless there was something awkward about this encounter. Like two different worlds coming together. Two worlds he probably wanted very much to keep apart. After a long pause, he finally added, with a tilt of his head toward the girl sitting on the floor, "This is my daughter." Then, to Ilana, "This is Ashley. She's a friend."
"Hi," the girl said, and she gave a little wave of her fingers, but didn't smile.
[Jarod Nightingale] [Belied = revealed...*sigh*]
[Ashley McGowen] Ilana offers forth her name, and Ashley's blue eyes flick in her direction once, and then they linger again. "It's good to meet you, Ilana," she says. She doesn't sweeten her tone or let it raise in pitch the way a lot of people do when speaking with children: it's just offered forth as though she were an adult. Friendlier than Ashley is with most adults, but all the same.
She would have allowed Jarod to leave it there and perhaps just drawn her own conclusions. When he speaks of learning a new language she looks toward the shelves and says, "Han'gul is kind of remarkable as an alphabet. I've always been curious," as though she weren't curious about most things. She'd comment on some of the similarities it has in form to written Enochian, but not in Ilana's presence.
That's offered up before Jarod introduces Ilana as his daughter, and when he does, Ashley looks back toward the girl again. And can't quite hide her surprise. Of course, she isn't really trying. Her eyebrows lift and knit together and there's a quick series of glances back and forth from Jarod to the girl, the way people do when they're given a piece of information that isn't only new but also unexpected.
"I, uh. Didn't know you had a daughter."
[Jarod Nightingale] Ashley was surprised. Jarod seemed to have expected this. Her reaction was roughly the same as... pretty much every other person he'd told who knew much of anything about him. He wasn't the parenting type, by any stretch of the imagination, and Ashley knew a side of him that was alternatively aloof, nihilistic, hyper-sexual and predatory. These were not characteristics that went easily in hand with comfort and tenderness. Certainly not with innocence.
And yet, there the girl was, and she looked too much like Jarod to not be a close relative. (And one would imagine that if he were going to lie, it would have been to claim that she was, as Ashley had first suspected, just his niece.) The fact that he'd chosen to be honest about who Ilana was... may have said something about his feelings toward Ashley. That he didn't completely distrust her.
"Yes, well. Now you know." He pulled a second book off the shelf and settled it atop the other one in the crook of his arm. "I'd appreciate it if you didn't convey this information to the group at large, for her sake." The tone of his voice and the expression on his face made the meaning of this statement clear: he wasn't keeping her a secret because he was embarrassed that he had a kid, he was keeping her a secret because he wanted to protect her.
Ilana, of course, looked up at him and wrinkled her nose in confused irritation. "What does that mean?"
Jarod sighed a bit and bent down to offer her his hand. "Nothing you need to worry about. We can talk about it later."
Which was exactly what every kid in the world hated to hear from their parents. It meant that something adult was being discussed - something that they weren't meant to be included in. Ilana didn't take his hand at first. She stared him down impudently, but when he didn't react to her piercing stare, she finally relented (at least on the surface) and closed her book, taking his hand to pull herself to her feet.
"Don't be mad," Jarod said softly as he kissed the top of her head. It was a moment of genuine affection, and something that Ashley might be surprised at. (Especially given their last notable encounter.) "I'll buy you some ice cream?" The tone was sweetly cajoling. Even charming. It was a difficult thing to resist, and sure enough, Ilana huffed out her breath in a little sigh and rolled her eyes. It was the affectionate kind of eye-rolling that children often gave to their parents. A sort of 'oh fine, I still love you.'
Satisfied with that reaction, Jarod turned his attention back to Ashley. "We should get going. It was nice seeing you."
[Ashley McGowen] Jarod suggests that she keep the information to herself, and Ashley says nothing. She has no reason to promise him anything; then again, she has no reason to want the information to get out to anyone else, either. When it comes to the personal lives of other magi she is generally discreet, so: he can expect her to act as she generally would, the look she gives him says.
But she has a similar protectiveness extended toward her apprentice, something dancing the line between being filial and being parental. And after what she's watched Morgan go through she knows exactly why he says it's for Ilana's sake.
She's silent while Jarod cajoles and promises ice cream, ostensibly because she doesn't know what to say (and she doesn't - but she's also watching.) That moment of affection doesn't seem to surprise her. If Ashley understands one thing about people it's that sometimes the most human things about themselves are the things they hide. It's not something she keeps in the forefront of her mind when dealing with others, but she's never surprised to be reminded of the fact.
"Good seeing you too," she says. "Good meeting you, Ilana," and the girl gets a wave. The thoughtful glance she turns back to the shelves isn't for the books, but as her fingertips wander along their spines until they find the one she needs, anyone who happened to look at her once would think so.
